Congratulations Nobel Laureate Gore!

News this morning is that Al Gore has won a Nobel prize. How very sad. Sad because this man could have been the leader of our country and of the free world and instead we have – well, you know. Anyway, I decided in light of this to do a little side-by-side of Gore and the man who instead became president.


Former President-Elect Al Gore - During his tenure as Vice President, the US economy expanded and government spending slowed.

G.W. - During his tenure as “President,” US spending exploded and many government programs were cut, mostly due to a little war in the Middle East.

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Gore – Despite low grades in his beginning years, graduated with honors from Harvard, where he studied government. Pursued a law degree at Vanderbilt, but left to enter politics.

G.W. – Received a bachelor’s degree in history from Yale, where he was an average student. Apparently missed all classes discussing the Revolutionary War, Hegel, and the Geneva Convention.

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Gore – Vehemently opposed the Vietnam War. Rejected a spot in the National Guard and enlisted in the US Army where he served as a journalist before being sent to Vietnam because he saw it as his civic duty.

G.W. – Served in the Texas Air National Guard (Champagne Unit) because “I was not prepared to shoot my eardrum out with a shotgun in order to get a deferment. Nor was I willing to go to Canada. So I chose to better myself by learning how to fly airplanes." His flight status was suspended and he requested a transfer to the Alabama National Guard where he may or may not have actually attended drill.

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Gore - Elected by the people as President of the United States in 2000.

G.W. - Assumed Office of the Presidency in 2001.

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Gore – With President Clinton, leaves the White House and the country with a budget surplus of $284 billion dollars in 2001.

G.W. – Inherits said surplus in 2001 and predicts $516 billion dollar surplus by 2006. Creates budget deficit of $296 billion dollars by end of FY06.

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Gore - During the aftermath of Katrina, chartered two private aircraft to help evacuate New Orleans’ citizens.

G.W. - “Brownie, you’re doing a heck of a job!”

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Gore – Appears on Saturday Night Live in a (if-only) mock State of the Union Address.

G.W. – Is mocked by Saturday Night Live and called out by rapper Kanye West for not liking black people. West forgets to mention the other groups of people the President dislikes such as Muslims, immigrants, and women.

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Gore - Authors The Assault on Reason, arguing that there is a trend in politics toward ignoring facts and analysis in policy-making.

G.W. - Is an assault on reason.

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Gore – Receives an Academy Award, an Emmy, and the Nobel Peace Prize for his work with the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change in his efforts to combat global warming and protect our environment for future generations.

G.W. The National Academy of Sciences releases a report on global warming, requested by Bush, in which they agree “with the assessment of human-caused climate change presented in the IPCC” report that “Human-induced warming and associated sea level rises are expected to continue through the 21st century." Claims G.W. in response, "We do not know how much our climate could, or will change in the future. We do not know how fast change will occur, or even how some of our actions could impact it." Continues to blow the hell out of the desert.

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Gore - Wins the Nobel freakin' Peace Prize!

G.W. - Is viewed as the second most dangerous leader in the world, behind only Bin Laden. Responds, “Aww, shucks!”