This morning you were getting ready for work and I was standing on the deck having a cigarette which seemed ridiculous when you were only yards away and about to leave and I could be spending that time talking to you. I assumed you would be dressed. I don’t know why I assumed it, but was happy to be wrong. I just sat down at the edge of the bed. I could think of no place nor time I’d rather be. Nowhere more beautiful than this moment. I wasn’t there long before you noticed me and sighed.
I was thinking about last night when we were talking about learning from each other. I was so excited about how my nerdy obsessions and love of art had finally fulfilled the promise of such pursuits - that the world could be unlocked someday, if only I learned enough. I just always thought I would be alone for the turning of the key. I never hoped to have someone beside me when it happened I sometimes dreamed I would leave the gates open behind me maybe, lead others to the doors with my words and my voice. But I never thought there would be someone there to share it with me, someone who needed through that gate even more than I did, but still kinda dug that I was along for the trip.
I have so much to learn from you. I could listen to you forever. Until we had no words left to share. Until all we could do is sit in each other’s company and you would still be teaching me, showing me what I have spent decades trying to learn – how to be so comfortable in your own body. Even as your own muscles fight against you.
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